Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The one where I post about my son's potty mouth

My oldest son turns 4 on Saturday. So you know that means I'm writing a sweet, mushy, love-fest of a post complete with pictures in a few days, right?

In the meantime, and before the love-fest begins, I thought I'd share with you an um... incident that happened last week, involving my son and my sister.

My sister and I took my boys to Baskin Robbins, and after enjoying our ice cream, we went back to my car. I put Dimitry in the car seat, and then my sister tried to buckle Christos up in his booster seat. She was having a difficult time doing up his seat belt, and frustrated, she gave up, huffing and puffing, and got out of the car so I could take over. I guess this made my son mad, because he screamed:

"FUCKING IDIOT!"

Did I mention he screamed this? In a crowded parking lot? Yup.

I gasp. I cover my mouth.

I look over at my sister, who was still outside the car, and she's gasping too.

And then we are both sort of laughing.

And then I look over to my left, and see a nice young Denzel Washington look-a-like who had just gotten out of his Escalade, gasp too. He shook his head, and sort of laughed. "Whoa!" he said.

"Oh, my goodness, Christos, what did you just say?" I asked, acting completely and utterly surprised that my son could utter such bad words.

"I have no idea where he ever heard that from! He's never done that before!" I said to the nice man.

(Completely lying through my teeth, as I know perfectly well he picked up his fine language skills from his bad-mouthed mommy who swears like a sailor, especially while driving and getting mad at other people who have no clue what they're doing on the road!)

"Kids will be kids, huh?" he said to me, partly making me feel a little better about the situation.

Meantime, Christos was actually totally embarrassed and was hiding in the car. I think he did learn his lesson that day. Never swear in public!

As for me - I am trying very hard to watch what I say around my boys, because they do repeat everything they hear.

And I could totally do without these types of embarrassing situations, you know?

32 comments:

A Woman On The Edge said...

OMG that is hilarious! I love that he used it in the proper context too! We've all been there Loukia, thanks for sharing!

Reluctant Housewife said...

I was very surprised when we were visiting an animal park and my son said, "Look at all these fuckin' animals."

"What kind of animals?"

"Fuckin'"

Oops. Time to start choosing my words a bit more carefully around the 4 year old, maybe.

Great post!

Gina said...

Just to clarify, i think he was calling the seatbelt a fuckin idiot and not the sister.

:)

Christy said...

That is freaking hysterical!

Scary Mommy said...

It happens to the best of us. Welcome to the club!!!

Scattered Mom said...

LOLOL.

When Jake was 2 we were in a mall shopping and he was dancing around singing the word "shit" over and over. Softly. Gently. Like it was a love fest song or something.

Took us a few minutes to figure out what he was saying and then we wanted to hide in the clothing racks, lolol.

truemommy said...

That is too funny! I have to learn to watch my mouth too...

Maria @BOREDmommy said...

Hilarious - I also like how your sister felt the need to clarify who/what your son was swearing at!!

King of New York Hacks said...

I think thats the same kid who carjacked me yesterday !! LOL

LZ @ My Messy Paradise said...

How hard is it not to laugh when this happens? We try not to swear around the girls, but also not react if M says anything bad. Recently, my youngest had a diaper blowout and M came running in to the kitchen "Mommy, Abby shit on the couch!" I think it took me an hour to calm down and stop giggling...
I'm glad you posted about this! These stories are great, and we can all relate and get a good laugh...

Chantal said...

LOL Oh my!

Hailey said...

So funny! Caroline calls everyone a "damn ass". She was trying to say dumb ass and that is what came out instead. Little does she know that the word she chose to go with ass is a bad word too! Ha! Oh well.

The White House said...

Yikes! That is too wild... The first time Avery cussed she sounded just like me. You know, sometimes those carseats will cause some rage!

Krystyn said...

Yikes...but it's pretty funny, too! Hopefully, he gets it out of his system before school, right?

Loukia said...

Krystyn - that is what I am hoping! He better not say that in school, oh, my!

Crystall said...

Sheew! Thanks for this post. Now, I won't feel so darn guilty when my boys say those things. They make small slip ups here and there, mostly about "wieners", "bums", and "idiots". The "fuckin" part has us beat. For now. :) I should be glad because my husband's favorite slang of the moment is "ass-clown". Is that cool to say now?

Natalie said...

Hahaha! My daughter called someone a "Dickhead!" one day! Oops!

ModernMom said...

LOL Smart little parrot!

Mom2Michael said...

LOL! You're not alone. This mommy has some potty mouth issues too.

The other day we were driving home on a particular stretch of downtown Toronto road, and a cyclist darted in to my path. I very carefully did NOT swear, but I did react.

Michael from his car seat, misinterpreted my reaction as relating to the (always) red light up ahead - "Fucking light!"

Do you think he's heard that a few times??

Must be more careful :-)

Shana said...

My son repeated "f*ck it" over and over again all the time for about 3months straight when he was 2! We've all been there, my friend!!!

CaraBee said...

My daughter is in full-on parrot mode these days. Today I burnt my finger on the skillet while I was making her lunch and I screamed out FUUUUCK! I immediately turn around and see her standing there. Her little lips moving. I'm pretty sure she was saying *that* word. Great.

Shannon @ AnchorMommy said...

Oh my.

I have just noticed my propensity to mutter "shit" under my breath, so I'm thinking I can expect that from my boy any day now.

Instead, this is how he embarrassed me today: first, he called my mom a cow. (He's been obsessed with them lately.) Then he said he wanted to see her nipples.

Oh... my... GAH.

Loukia said...

You guys all rock. Thanks for telling me I'm not the only potty-mouthed mommy out there! ;)

Poxxy said...

My kids and I have this agreement that seems to work for us. As long as they use the word in the correct context, in the right circumstance, in front of the appropriate audiance, and out of my hearing range, they can say what they want, when they want and to whom they choose. So far, this "ignorance-is-bliss" approach seems to work. It must, they've never tasted Dove nor any other brand of soap. Great post!

Ness said...

Best post ever!! I can't believe he said that!

I'm waiting for the day when one of my kids says something like that. I know I'll be horrified but sometimes I completely forget that they are around when I say it!

And I live on a military base, so there is not shortage of potty mouths!

Jessica said...

Holy shit!

Anonymous said...

OMG Loukia!!!!!!! What are you teaching your boys!!! LMAO!!!!! I would have peed my pants laughing!!!

Ana

Paging Doctor Mommy said...

I've had to clean up my potty mouth as well! My husband laughs and says that I may as well be a cross between a sailor and a trucker with the way I talk. Not any more since Reagan repeats everything she hears!

Mommy Lisa said...

Okay, MONDAY this week our daycare lady stops my husband picking her up and says, "BooBoo said a naughty word when playing today." Hubby braces for the worst..."she called Kenzie a 'jerk'!" whew, thinks hubby, it could have been a$$h*l* or worse. "That's not so bad." says Daycare husband. Yup, not so bad....(we swear like sailors when we drive too.)

Wendy@RuensOnTheRun said...

Hahaha, too funny! Yep, you better get it out of his system before school!

BeachMama said...

Hilarious. Nothing like your own child echoing your words to make you thing twice about yelling at the guy in front of you. I often call them 'jack' for short, once in a while J will yet out, "hey Jack!" I find it funny, because only I know the full meaning of 'jack'.

daddybookins said...

That is classic!! By all means, not appropriate....buuuuuuut...I have been warned on more than I can count occasions - to watch my mouth by the mrs.....yes, this daddy-o is a master of sorts when it comes to the creative #$%^&* remarks.

Peas Out!
~daddy b

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