As I sit her watching the Hope For Haiti Now telethon in the comfort of my safe 2-story home, with my children sleeping soundly upstairs, my tears are flowing freely.
I am a very emotional person, and ever since I became a mom, I am even more emotional. Especially about children - I can't bear the thought of any child in the world suffering. It breaks my heart, it haunts me, it keeps me up at night. The earthquake that recenlty happened in Haiti took the lives of hundreds of thousands of people. Thousands of children are now orphans, left alone, scared, without a mommy or a daddy to hold them, to hug them, to rock them to sleep.
This to me is the greatest tragedy of all - that along with the fact that parents have lost children, too many children, in this devestating earthquake.
It is too much - if you let yourself feel, it is too much. Donating money is all I can do, and sadly, that does not feel like a lot at all. I wish I could transport myself to this nation right now, so I can pick up a child, or two, or more, and hug them, feed them, provide for them, make them feel safe again.
The thought of adopting a baby from Haiti has entered my mind, more seriously tonight than every before. The thought of adopting a child from another country has been a thought of mine before, too - after I watched a special on an orphanage in Romania that nearly broke my heart.
I want nothing more than for every child who is suffering right now to be reunited with a loved one again, or to be adopted by loving parents, and to live in a warm, safe home. I want every child to be filled with love again, and laughter. To go to school, to reach their full potential.
Tonight, as I sit here watching the video footage from the tragedy in Haiti, seeing children being rescued from crumbled buildings, seeing families reunited, seeing babies sleeping side by side on crib mattresses outside, with no roof over their heads, I am overcome with sadness and a feeling of utter hopelessness - but at the same time, I'm thankful for the people - the volunteers - who are in Haiti right now, on the ground, helping those who are suffering.
I'm thankful organizations like UNICEF and SOS Children's Villages and Doctors Without Borders and of course, Red Cross exist - because of these amazing organizations and volunteers, so many lives have been saved, so many more will be saved, and children will be fed.
I know we have all done what we can, financially, to help the people of Haiti.
I hope I always remember how I feel tonight on days when I think I'm having a rough day, on days I complain about being tired. I'm so lucky to live where I do, to have all that I have, to be blessed with my boys and a roof over my head, and to have access to medication and clean water. I will continue to keep the children and everyone in Haiti in my prayers for a very long time.
I hope you will do the same.