August 1st, 2005.
Before, and after.
Nothing changes a person like the day they become a mom for the first time. My life completely shifted the day my son was born. I always knew I wanted to be a mother, I just didn't know how powerful the love would be. I was in a definite zombie-like state for at least the first six weeks, scared even to sleep, for fear of something happening to my baby.
I look at my child, still very much my baby, and am amazed at the things he knows and understands. While he loves to do normal six year old things like build with LEGO, make sand castles on the beach, read books, play with his army people and master Angry Birds better than his parents, he's different. He's wise, wise beyond his years.
"In World War II, moms and babies and people who were not bad died, too, right mom? How did Hitler die? Why was there a war?"
(I usually tell him to ask his father when the questions are too hard for me to answer.)
"Mom, what exactly did Einstein invent?"
(Dear God, you never told me I'd have to answer these types of questions!)
"Mom, do pregnant people have to go to jail, too?"
"Yes, sweetie," I replied.
"Then what happens to their baby after?"
(This is where parenting gets hard...)
As the days and years go by, not only does my love grow for my children, but I realize more and more that parenting is not easy. It's rewarding, sure, but it's also very challenging. It's a 24 hours a day job, but a job I am very thankful for, every single day.
My first-born son is compassionate and loving, doting on his baby cousins, taking care of his little brother.
This morning, the two of them were fighting.
"Why is Chirstos only nice to me when we're at camp, mama?" my little Dimitry asked.
This made me smile, because I know how much his brother looks after him when I'm not around. I see him, a pro in the swimming pool, cheer on his little brother as he swims across to the deep end, without floaties on, proud smile on his face.
He knows the Elements, and asks me which one my favourite is.
"Um... diamond?" I respond.
"MOM! Diamond is not an element!" he'll laugh at me.
My big boy is now six - SIX! years old. I still can't believe it myself. How does time go by so quickly, and why isn't there a pause button?
Yes, my son is six. Starting grade one in a month. And I am just... in awe of him. And of course, worried. But I know there is nothing we can't handle together.
Happy Birthay to my beautiful little boy... I love you (and your brother!) more than you'll ever know!